Soom.

Don't worry.

I'm still alive and kickin'.

Perhaps not kicking, but still alive nevertheless.

Self destruct

Hey, do you people watch cantonese dramas?

Like those on 311?

Isn't it funny how they sometimes use the same actress as both the mother and the daughter when she's grown up?

I used to think it was really annoying last time when I was a kid.

Now its like...haha haven't you people heard of genetics? What? She cloned? Or had binary fission?

Yeah.

I have no life.

~Smartee Pants

P.S. Gwen Lee, you know, either he has some ultra top secret excuse reason.

Or he's just an ass. (No. I'm not sorry for saying this. You can slap me in school.)

Either way, what does that tell you?

P.P.S. Graduation is tomorrow. But we still have to go to school after that. Sigh, gotta love the system. Msia boleh.

P.P.S. My grad robes are UGLY and unwashed. Which part of dirty dark turquoise does the school not SEE?

Don't want deja vu

I didn't lose faith in you. I was just a little disappointed. Not because of that... that.

But because you're so capable of saying a lot of things, yet nothing happens.

We both know its not the first time.

So just stop making empty promises.

'Cuz then you'll be less pressured, and I'll be less disappointed.

Metatarsals

I have one normal foot, and one abnormal foot.

Two probabilities.

[Left foot (miniscule) X right foot (normal)] + [left foot (normal) X right foot (ultra large)] = damnit

Either way, that gives me a pair of abnormal feet.

And that's why I had hell trying to get a pair of stinkin' heels for graduation.

Either my right foot can't fit into the shoe size that my left foot fits perfectly. Or my left foot looks like an utter idiot in the shoe size that my right foot fits perfectly.

I hate feet.

Anyway, my creepy pair of metatarsals did get their happy ending. I did get the heels...so on Saturday I won't only be graduating from high school. xD you get what I mean, chuamaeyeng? heehee.

Ohh, and before I forget, let me credit Tweety bird for this.

Mum: Woi, after dinner you better go study.
Me: Hmm?
Mum: How many hours were you on the phone just now?
Me: What?
Mum: Talk more on the phone lah. See how your dad explode later when he gets the phone bill.
Me: Haaahhh?
Mum: After dinner, no more phone calls. GO STUDY.
Me: Whaaat? I can't hear you~
Mum: I SAID YOU BETTER STUDY UNTIL MIDNIGHT AFTER DINNER.
Me: HAHH?? I CAN'T HEAR YOU~
Mum: AFTER DINNER YOU BETTER GO STUDY OR ELSE I WI-
Me: CAN YOU SPEAK LOUDER I CAN'T HEAR YOU~
Mum: *huffs away and leaves*

Btw, yes, we were sitting next to each other and I was being a complete ass. And like I said, thanks to Leowlipop (Ben-dubbed-Tweety-bird) for this method of annoyance. She uses it on me everyday at school. ^.^

Okay, I shall go make phone calls now.

Just kidding.

Maybe just for awhile. >.<

~Smartee Pants

P.S. Gwen Lee, I know how you feel. The first thought that comes to mind might probably be "wtf do you think you are", but I really do. To a certain extend.

P.P.S. I feel like I've been getting very sulky around you lately. Is it getting harder and harder to put up with me? We don't agree on a lot of things, and that's okay, but I don't wanna disagree on a lot of things either.

P.P.P.S. Darn I need to update my Thieves list. Grr, its like change-blog-link season. =( Maybe I should follow the trend.

Thumbs up

1. Blake Shelton - Hillbilly Bone
2. Simple Plan ft. Natasha Bedingfield - Jet Lag
3. The Script - Nothing
4. One Republic - Good Life
5. Tyler Ward & Boyce Avenue - Fix You (Coldplay Cover)
6. Javier Colon - Stitch By Stitch


In no particular order.

All the female artists in the world have fallen off my thumbs-up playlist.

Except for Xenia.

7. Xenia - The Man Who Can't Be Moved (The Script Cover)

~Smartee Pants

P.S. Gwen Lee.

Coldplay - Fix You.

Stubborn

I'm hungry.

Like half crazed starving.

Even though I ate the whole pot of lamb stew today...straight from the pot.

~Smartee Pants

P.S. Gwen Lee.






Why does it feel like you're making the same mistake I made?

Fix me

I signed into Blogger today and the first thing I saw on my dashboard was a notification that claimed:

We've updated Blogger!
Our updated interface is fast, modern and clean.

It sure as hell better be. Because I'm gonna test upload photos soon and if fast, modern and clean Blogger screws it up, I might just do something really drastic.

Like throw dung bombs at their headquarters switch to Tumblr. Hmph.

------------------------------------------

People need to hear Javier Colon's Switch By Switch. He Is Amazing. Like Insane Absolutely No Doubt Amazing. In fact, he is so incredible, I just typed sentences with capped words...for him. And I never do that. Ever.

But seriously, all SucksPM-stressed jokes aside, the dude is every singing talent in the world -- any world -- combined. Do yourself a favour. Open your youtube tab and search "Javier Colon - Stitch By Stitch".

I swear you will not regret it. Unless you're the Iron Maiden type exclusively...then that's a different case...

~Smartee Pants

P.S. Gwen Lee, you might as well get used to seeing your name featured here for awhile... because I'm not gonna stop, until you do. Just because I can't find the words to harrass you about it during school doesn't mean I can't screw you here until you're okay.

P.P.S. Javier Colon, people. Stitch By Stitch on youtube/google/rapidshare/filestube/whatever-you-use-to-illegally-download-music.

And seriously, enough with the defaecation jokes. (>.<)

Lights will guide you home~

And ignite your bones~

I will try... to fix you~



Intense

Aloha.

I'm back.

And I've been gone so long that I'm not really sure how to write here anymore.

So many emotions and thoughts cramped up in my little brain that I need to purge out. Sometimes I wish I could just milo-dispense them all out. Inner joke. Nevermind that.Long story short, as that dratted SucksPM draws closer, its getting a little harder each day to reach for my daily dose of sanity.

Damn I need to study.

Finding your better half = losing yourself

Real or not real?

I used to think... not real. Yeah sure, people talk ahelluvalot about that person and people whom I don't even really kinda sorta pretend to know start asking me random questions about him when we both know I'm not gonna answer truthfully and they don't care either way.

"Oi Vicki, how's *inserthisname*?"

"*says the first thing that comes to mind*"

Thanks for wasting 6 seconds of my life, peep.

Seriously, stop asking for the sake of asking. Disclaimer: This is only targetted to a certain select group of people who are hell bent on asking stupid questions that nobody will care to answer.
To people who actually give a shyt, TYVMYTIMAWW&NS (and all my blog readers are gonna start asking me wtf this is. ^^)

Anyway, back to the line in pink. I'm starting to think its kinda true. In a way.

You don't lose yourself. (Well at least I didn't..) But you don't hold on to your original identity altogether either. Maybe that was what threw me off balance in the beginning. Having to think and proactively consider someone else's feelings in every major decision I make was not what I signed up for. Because I wasn't used to not belonging to me and only me.

And lets just face it. Its not like we know...knew...each other like the back of our palm...hand...which one is it...damn my english....metacarpals.

I remember anonymous asked me a few months ago.

"So Vicki, how does it feel to finally be in a real relationship?"

And I answered...

...I didn't know how to answer so I threw the question back at her.

I think I have an answer already though.

Leowlipop told me today that she felt very relieved that she doesn't have a better half, after seeing all her friends die partially (haha that's like ionising partially omg whats wrong with me) from their relationships.
I didn't really know what to say to that, because its justified. Its like quarrel-then-break-up-or-no-quarrel-but-still-break-up season these past few months.

And with that...my blogging bug died. So I might as well just sign off.

~Smarteepants

IS. BACK.

P.anSwer. It feels like a blessing and a curse at times. So much pleasure with such pain. Sometimes it hurts like shyt...and yet I know I won't let it go. If I had to use one word to describe it, it'd be...

Intense.

That one word doesn't sum up everything about us, but it sure says alot.
There are these times when I just feel like curling up into a ball and bawl my eyes out.

And there are these times when I feel lightheaded from the level of intensity.

And then there are the moments where I ride that roller coaster rush of emotion.

But most times, all I know is I'm just happy where I am. =) And I'm not scared anymore.

P.P.S. There's two things on my mind. One, after SucksPM. Two, before SucksPM. Damn.

P.P.P.S. Gwen Lee, move on...and those who are worth it will move together with you.

P.P.P.P.S. NG MING YANG MUST NOW UPDATE HIS BLOG.

Vulnerable

My hands.

Are shaking.

Visibly shaking.

Terrified.

I just need to get it all out. Every single thing.


God, please forgive me. Please.



With such pleasure, comes such pain.





And fear.

Blueberry cheese.

I woke up today and the first thing I saw were the flowers. Lavender roses, to be exact. And something else which I can't identify. I'm not a flower person, okay?

The second thing was the cake.

And the third was the card that read, "To: My dear sister. HAPPY GETTING OLD. HOPE YOU HAD A WONDERFULLLLLLL DAY!!!! Can't wait to see you in Singapore!!!! XXX From: Jaime & James"

Hahaha, thanks J&J. The cake is awesome...although most of it will end up in daddy's alimentary canal.

~SP

P.S. Yes, I counted the number of "L"s in "wonderful". It was exact. =P

P.P.S. Can't wait to see you too, dopey.

Big girls don't cry.

So a few people have been asking me what I want for turning seventeen next week.

Hmm, I don't know, really. Honestly, I want...to not turn seventeen.

Originally, I think my mental wishlist was as long as the red carpet that Amelia and Jasvin worked on together alone for ten hours magically appeared during Hari Guru 2011.

But.

I don't know what's gotten into me lately.

Is it possible to be so lethargic, yet so motivated?

So estatic, yet so depressed?

Wide awake, yet so tired?

So relaxed. Yet so tensed.

Its like the calm before the storm.

I don't believe in turning back time, or changing the past, but there are these rare moments of reflection when I really wish I could go back to... kindergarten. Of all places. =.=" When things were a lot simpler than they are now.

Anyway, back to the present.

I decided to give myself the best birthday present ever.

24 hours of sleep from sunday 00:00 till monday 00:00.

Isn't that like awesome?

But then my mum shot down the whole idea and insisted we go out for the usual family dinner and then Xiao asked me to hang out with her.

So yeah my sleeping plans are ruined.

But its okay.

Oh yeah. My wishlist.

Macbook Pro, IPhone 4, and as LipopLeow reminded me today...a dark mahogany mare.

In no particular order.

But then Leowlipop had to very tactlessly remind me that all of the above is virtually impossible, especially since the last one has a seven digit price tag.

And truth is, I don't even remember why I want those things anymore. So...insignificant.

Lately, everything seems a lot less important.

I wonder why.

So if you peeps are just dying to get me something for 3rd July, you can buy me lunch.

Who says there's no such thing as a free lunch in this world?

Let's prove the world wrong.

~SP

P.S. I can't make you understand what you just don't understand.

P.P.S. Anyone wanna help me write a 750 word long essay?

P.P.P.S. Anyone at all? T_T

I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing
Just praying to a God that I still believe in

I'm falling to pieces.

They say bad things happen for a reason.
But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding.

I'm falling to pieces.

Congratulations

I don't know which was worse. My own disappointment, or the look on your face.

I feel like I let you...us...down.

Yeah, this sucks.









I can't express myself. That's the problem.

Fighting inertia

I have been sleeping early and waking up early.
I have been doing my homework.
I have not been scolded by my parents for abusing overusing the internet.
I have no life.

Let me explain.

I have been sleeping early in the morning and waking up early in the afternoon.

I have been doing my homework but that stupid pile has not gone down. Its like trying to shrink Mt. Everest to freaking Kinabalu.

I have not been scolded by my parents for overusing the internet because I've been using it at unearthly hours. Like when they sleep. XD Seriously, I don't touch the internet during the day. =O

I have no life. No explanation needed.

The cons of developing an abnormal bedtime cycle.


*12:00pm approx*

you: go to the toilet and wash your face
me: yes, going now..

*10 seconds later*

you: you're still lying on your bed right?
me: yea T_T


I can't sleep when I'm awake. I can't wake up when I'm asleep.

Its like...like...inertia.

I hate physics!

~SP

P.S. Siapa nak pergi MTV World Stage?

P.P.S. I hate boxes. T_T

P.P.P.S. Boxes can go to **** seriously.

P.P.P.P.S. Nah, just kidding. =P

-----------------------------------
Edit: Blogger just screwed up all my fonts. Too lazy to edit it again. Use highlight.

Or just don't read.

Counting sheep.

I'm sleep deprived.

ZzZzzzZ.

Because I've been sleeping at 5...6...for the past few days. AM, btw. That's like...an hour before sunrise.

Stupid horror movie. After watching Insidious, I stalked James Wan on wikipedia and read through all 7 plots of SAW. And then I went through every single thing on the Insidious film website.

Hence my sleep deprived condition.

I'm dying to watch SAW.

But I think I'll die from lack of sleep if I do...so maybe its better to hold off for awhile. Until like after SPM when I'm actually allowed to die.

SucksPM. So true. This is too good not to share. No, I didn't invent this awesome word. Credit goes to someone who is a lot less awesome than I am.

Gotta catch some shut eye.

~SP

P.S. Rule no. 209

P.P.S. My =O levels are a whole lot more epic.

P.P.P.S. I don't think I can sleep tonight...

I just realised I forgot to say...

Lets see, we bumped into Christie, Xiao, Gwen, Eevonne, Ben, Dylan, Ivan, a few other people whose names I don't remember and a whole lot of ex-SBSians whom I didn't even recognise.

In no particular order.

Its a small world after all.

And in that small world, everybody flocks to Pavilion.

Stupid poster is in French or something.

Anyway it says "from the creators of SAW & Paranormal Activity... INSIDIOUS". (no I can't read french. its common sense.)

So worth watching. So, so, so, SO worth it. For several reasons.

1. Scared the crap out of me.
2. Its from the makers of SAW.
3. Scared the crap out of Hazman.
4. Its from the makers of Paranormal Activity.
5. Scared the crap out of Siew Yan.

Quote her. "Vicki, can you teman me to the toilet????? I need to...etc.."
Yes, that was after Insidious. Her badass reputation is gone. ^^

In her defence, the movie was really terrifying. It wasn't as scary as I expected it to be, but it sure as hell frightened the...hell out of me. Although I wasn't really terrified.

I mean, the movie was scary, but I didn't really feel the full scare effects...am I making sense...?

Moral of the story... don't take photographs & don't go to sleep. T_T both of which I love doing. No sleep, no life. T.T Literally.

Anyone looking for a good scare should check this ou- ohh, why am I even saying this when I know for a fact that most of the people who read my blog don't watch horror movies?

I shall go torment somebody now with my inability to sleep after watching such movies. XD

~SP

P.S. I didn't scream...I yelped. There's a difference. Big, big difference. Go google it. X)

P.P.S. I wanted to but I can't yet and anyway eventually I will.

 The wait forever part was a joke. =P

P.P.P.S. And when you said that, all I wanted to do was burst into tears and cry.

P.P.P.P.S. ...thank you. =)

Trials & tribulations

We won...Nationals!!!

(without going through Sectionals & Regionals)







Congrats, SMKSBS's choral speaking team! =) You have officially beaten your arch-nemesis/next door neighbour.


*CLAP CLAP*

Bye.

Overdrive.

I found this kinda...sort of...interesting (???) website from Xiao's blog. There goes...90 minutes of my life.

Six
Seven
Twelve
Thirteen. (No, I'm not being sexist. It just...just...is.)
Fourteen
Eighteen
Twenty eight. (Sorry...won't happen again XD)
Twenty nine
Fifty five
Fifty seven. (except that last one XD)
Sixty one
Seventy three
SEVENTY SIX
Eighty two
Eighty four.......
Eighty five
Eighty six
Eighty...seven. xD
Ninety one
Hundred...?
Hundred and thirteen
Hundred and nineteen
Hundred and twenty
Hundred and twenty...haha...six.
Hundred and thirty...six
Hundred and thirty... >.< ...nine.
Hundred and forty.
Hundred and forty two
Hundred and forty three. XD
Hundred and fifty
Hundred and fifty one
Hundred and fifty two
Hundred and fifty three
Hundred and fifty five
Hundred and fifty six
Hundred and seventy five
Hundred and seventy nine
Hundred and eighty two. 280511
Hundred and eighty six
Hundred and eighty eight
Hundred and eighty nine
Hundred and ninety four
Two hundred and two

Hundred and eighty eight
Hundred and eighty eight

188

No. 188

Rule No. 188

So don't say it, because you don't know it yet.

Unless you do.



And if you're wondering, well, that's why I don't, because I want to mean it when I do.

All you're ever gonna be is MEAN.

Maybe if you weren't so critical all the time...

...people wouldn't think twice about telling you stuff.

--Christie Chua (unless you plagiarised it)

Yes, this is a http://thecutedolphin.blogspot.com/ tribute. You're so inspiring, short stuff.

Can I just copy & paste her post here?

Sometimes I think they made our brains with the same formula...except mine's a little smaller than yours.

So many things has happened since I last blogged...where to start, where to start?

I'm too lazy busy to blog nowadays.

That includes today. Bye.

~SP

P.S. Drink green tea everyday, short. Its what I do...and I haven't been sick since. I'm not sure which one is the magical part though...the "green" or the "tea". Hmm.

P.P.S. You, with your words like knives and swords and weapons that you use against me
You, have pointed out all my flaws again... AS IF I DON'T ALREADY SEE THEM.

P.P.P.S It feels like global warming, literally...and metaphorically. =P

P.P.P.P.S. So hawt~ XD

Bumble bee

I took the monorail yesterday all the way to Titiwangsa and back.

Just for the heck of it.

It was kinda fun dumb though.




In my defense, it wasn't my idea at all! =O


P.S. Friday was perfection. ^^

Chocolate cookies ^^

Just reminding someone to gimme her blogspot address so I can link her. ^.^



Reminder to myself:

1. Blogs are very public.

2. Anyone can read this.

3. Watch what you say here, Vicki. XD


~Smarteepants.

P.S. Yes, yes, I'm suppose to be studying T.T but my dad's computer was on and it was just so tempting to take a break and-

EXCUSES. T_T  At least I'm good at something.

Bye, peeps. =)

Hello, bio. =(

You are the only exception.

I just watched Wong Fu Productions - Strangers, Again

Kinda true, and the girl is kinda pretty very meaningful. =)

Which reminds me.

Sometimes I wonder if you really mean what you say. 'Cause its like you say one thing, and then you say another thing to another person which doesn't really coincide with what you say to me.

I guess people never say what they will eventually mean.

Or maybe its just you and your habit of saying the right thing at the right time.

Hmm, whatever. It doesn't make a difference anymore. ^.^

And wow, I just realised I say that all the time in reference to you, but this is the first time I actually really mean it. O.O LAWL.

---------------------------------------

Dopey & her better half are arriving on Friday!

I miss her so much. T_T

Me & Dopey =)

Can't wait for Friday.

Rebecca Black's voice is annoying.

~Smarteepants.

P.S.
I used to know my place was a spot next to you
Now I'm searching the room for an empty seat
'Cause lately I don't even know what page you're on

Oh, a simple complication
Miscommunications lead to fall outs
So many things that I wish you knew
So many walls up I can't break through

Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room
And we're not speaking
And I'm dying to know
Is it killing you like it's killing me?
I don't know what to say
Since a twist of fate when it all broke down
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now

How'd we end up this way?
See me nervously pulling at my clothes and trying to look busy
And you're doing your best to avoid me

Why are we pretending this is nothing?
I'd tell you I miss you but I don't know how
I've never heard silence quite this loud

This is looking like a contest
Of who can act like they care less
But I liked it better when you were on my side
The battle's in your hands now
But I would lay my armor down

Hey girl, what happened to us?

Don't pretend you don't know that I still miss you sometimes.

Wishful thinking.

Silly me.

Drugs.

I can't believe IU day is over already. After 3 months of watching the people who sit behind me die from the pressure...its finally over.

And I thought I'd develop Airplanes phobia (no that wasn't a grammatical error) that I'd chuck both the song and the instrumental in the recycle bin after Saturday... but hmm, apparently not. Its still on my playlist, surprisingly. ^.^

Gwen & Jiun are becoming normal again. =D (THEIR kind of normal lah. =S)

--------------------------------------

I ate 2 pills this morning.

I fell asleep in the car on the way to school. I fell asleep during assembly. I fell asleep in between Chem & +Math. I fell asleep after +Math. I fell asleep during the end of pendidikan-supposedly-moral. I fell asleep the moment I got into the car after school.

And in between falling asleep, I was basically in a daze. Blurrrrr~ It was amazing how I managed to keep track of whatever conversations I had today. (which I have now forgotten >.<)

Everything was so shiny & sparkly today. Black & whites were duller, coloured hues intensified. And time passed so quickly...and yet so slowly.

The effects wore off after school, but I just took another 2 pills...and I swear either something's wrong with my eyesight or everything that has colour suddenly has doubled intensity.

Stupid medication.

~Smartee Pants

P.S. My brain's so muddled now...I can't be held accountable for anything I say...

______________________

Edit: Sheesh, its antibiotics, not ecstasy pills!

Heels so high

Everyone is stressed out about everything.

Sometimes it feels like I'm the only normal person in the world.

But since approximately 20 people imply that I'm abnormal everyday, I guess that's not the case. >.<

----------------------------

SBS's International Understanding Day is in another 40 hours.

I still haven't memorised the lyrics to Price Tag. And I still keep screwing up my parts (What's wrong with me? =O). Sigh, if I mess up this performance, I know Benjamin Tan will kill me...

...or not. XD

~Smarteepants

P.S. I forgot to buy your shades! Crap!

P.P.S. I'm hungry.

So am I =)

What I wanted to say but didn't know how to was... thank you for letting me go.

'Cuz this is the best damn thing that could have happened. =)

You make me wanna say OMG (Part II)

Oh my gosh.

What did I do in these past seventeen years to deserve this?

I guess life surprises you the most when you least expect it.

But that's cool.

I like surprises. XD

P.S. I didn't take hamster pics 'cuz mummy & daddy freaked out so much when I let them outta the cage. Pfft...

P.P.S. And that's why I smile. =) Its been awhile since everything has felt this right.

Squared.

Why do I feel like this?

And why must someone something always turn up to ruin it?

You make me wanna say OMG.

Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit. Shit. Shit. SHIT.



=D

Gosh, Vicki...

Anyway, that aside.

I'm bored, okay?

I wake up, I go to school, I come home from school, I use the bathroom, I play with hamsters, I sleep, I eat, I try not to eat too much, I fail, so I eat some more, I do homework, I go to school. I play with more hamsters.

I have no life. T_T

Anyway, I brought Dobby & Dopey home today.

I totally love those hamsters.

The catch is...I'm not even an animal lover. I run from Pauline's dog. I run from Xiao's dog. I run from dogs. I throw stray cats food that I don't want. Enough said. And I treat other animals the same way I treat small kids who cling too much to me.

So why, why, why, did I fall for these hamsters?

I'm turning into a hamster-obsessed maniac.

My DSLR will be working hard today. =) Hopefully I'll be able to snap several good pics.

Okay, time to pretend to study.

~Billionaire

P.S. Actually I wanted to say, "What does that make me to you?"

But I didn't.

You make me smile =)

This post is one week overdue.

So I wrote out this fantastic blabbering nonsensical post about 6 For Japan & Jogathon Day, but unfortunately somehow blogger managed to delete it with one keystroke and not save a draft. Clap clap for blogspot.com.

And since I've more or less forgotten my deleted post, I'm gonna cut the crap and get to the point.

News has been floating around that the winner got approximately RM450 worth of votes (that adds up to 2200 votes). So that means if 6 For Japan won, then we'd have to donate RM2K+ to Japan's relief effort fund.

Even if we don't win, teacher mentioned that the votes are all quite close to each other. So I doubt the amount will be anything less enough to make a difference.

Either way, we're screwed. T_T

Anyway, pics.

 Red vs. Blue =)

Best friend & bodyguard.

This world is so twisted. XD

Sahi, my completely useless bodyguard.

Can't decide on who's more of a loser. Lefty or righty?

Leowlipop plucking her eyeball out. X)

6 For Japan pics.

6-minus-1 For Japan =D

Aiza & Pearly

Peter

Ben Tan

Aiza

Me.

Everyone agreed on wearing bright colours.

But everyone ended up wearing black/white/grey/brown.

So poor stupid me ended up looking like a yellow monster.

And it didn't help that the backdrop was none other than...yup, you guessed it, yellow.

6 For Japan. =)

Moment of randomness.

Chaotic Crew.

They look totally chaotic in this photo, what with the intruding stage crew & the altogether missing Kagen.

And...they're obviously-most-probably-kinda-sorta-confirmed the winners.

Well, as much as I hate to admit it, they also happened to be fricking talented. So kudos.

Most of the photography credits go to Xietin & Sara. (The unprofessional pictures are totally mine T_T)

I'm tired.

And its not even 10pm yet.

You know what that means, peeps?

It means poor little Vicki has no life.

At all.

I shall excuse myself now, as I have better things to do. Like setting my alarm clock trying to figure out what's wrong with my Nokia X6. It won't bloody send messages. So basically I couldn't reply any of the messages sent to me today. And that's darn annoying 'cuz some of them were official correspondences which FYI I really need to reply, you stupid nokia phone.

Anyway, for real now, tata.

Good night, world.

~Smarteepants

P.S. I think it might be happening... and I'm kinda wondering if you're thinking the same thing.

Or maybe its just my brain on overdrive. =.="

P.P.S. "Ohh, 'cuz L** J** I fell for you"~  I'm so obsessed with this song. XD

And I was like...blogger, blogger, blogger, noooo~

OHMYSTUPIDGOSH.

I TYPED EVERYTHING OUT NICELY.

I UPLOADED ALL THE PICTURES.

I ARRANGED THEM NEATLY.

I CAPTIONED ALL OF THEM PERFECTLY.

THEN...

THEN....

THEN!

THEN!

THEN THEN THEN!

THEN BLOGGER EFFIN DELETED MY ENTIRE POST BEFORE I COULD POST IT!

If I could slap blogger right across its face right now, I'd do it a million times.

Slap whack dush pow doink doink twack dush dush smack twang dush doink!

FYI, I was so in the mood to blog about Jogathon day.

But right now I just wanna pick a fight with this stupid blog site.

Nearly an hour worth of looking, selecting, uploading, typing, captioning and arranging gone down blogger's sewage drain damnit!

Blogger can go to its cyber equivalent of hell.

And I'm gonna go sleep this misery off.

Goodbye.

~Smartee pants...

P.S. ...is effin pissed.

P.P.S. I really wanted to post about SBS Got Talent today. =(

Nou se mond la

SBS Got Talent is tomorrow! =O

For every vote that we get, 6 For Japan will be donating RM1.00 to the japan relief effort fund.

So please vote for us! =D




Even if we suck.

*insert title*

Holidays are almost over here!

Yay!

Not!

English folio. T.T  Sigh. The sole reason why my existence during holidays is such a miserable excuse of a LIFE.
I'm so gonna just rip off some 5A student's work.

Hmph, its not plaguerism (spelling, spelling? =O)

Its just my subtle way of rebelling against the ridiculous idea of having to do that English-stupid-folio.

And that was just an excuse to copy other people's work.

Teehee.

I'm inspirationless, Terribly Nice. I don't feel like blogging. =(

Lalala~

Oh.

When in doubt, write it out. =)

Lets end with a song. =) 

I'm not okay but I'm halfway there~
Had to take a detour~
All the way to the love~
We never had anyway~
I can't be your safety net, its not just fair~
But I could be your best friend~

Same old tired lonely games~
Back to where we were again~
But don't bother going out of your way~
'Cause I'll be okay, and some things never really change~

You were right though. It wasn't fair to me. Although I never thought about it that way until you mentioned it. O.o

I'm such a selfless person. ^.^

~SmarteepAnts.

P.S. Leooowli, leooowli, oh, leowlipop!~
Nah, that's not how we do it.
Leowli, leowli, leowlipop, oh...~

P.P.S. I can't stop singing. What's wrong with me? =S

P.P.P.S. Haha, cannot list them out la. Later you really get mad, then I habis.

P.P.P.P.S. Ohh, ohhh, you all must vote for my group during SBS Got Talent!, okay?  =)

Even if we suck.

You just need to read this.

Edit: I blog like this. Title. And P.S.'s. Everything else in between are fragments of thoughts and little unimportant-to-you stuff.

Just saying, 'cuz I know people won't read this crazy sial long post.

-----------------------------------------
I'm not sure what I'm doing here.

Well, technically, I'm not suppose to be here, 'cuz its a school night...uhh, school morning actually (I have school in 5 hours... I keep typing "school", argh!). And I'm bloody darn tired.

But, I just had the sudden urge to...type. When I say "type", I actually mean blurt out all the little strange things that I've been feeling lately minus the struggle of having to speak.

Enlightenment.

Unlike the way enlightenment has been showing up 2 inches from my nose, this time its not something that hit me hard in the face, like a baseball whack or anything.

But something a little more subtle that has been occuring over the past few days...yeah, days only. Like a swell of emotions that I can't really put into words.

I'm not making sense to anyone but myself. I know, I know. Can't be helped. Its the way I write. Unintelligible. (<< is that how you spell it?)

Anyway, back to enlightenment. Its kinda like...I realised...I'm mumbling...but...

Other people can't help you, unless you let them.

Oh, trust me, I hear that phrase over and over again, from parents to friends to people who meditate to people I don't even know. But lately, it just seems like a whole lot deeper than what I used to think of it.

I think you -- and in that sense, I...as in, me-- need to realise that people try to help. People always try to help when you have problems. Its just that...sometimes they can't. Sometimes they can, but don't know how to. Sometimes they know how to, but just...just...can't. And sometimes its not they're fault when that happens.

If you're (you, as in ME. I'm like...self-lecturing.) gonna let your stinking emotions get in the way, other people might not be able to do anything. And the problem is the emotion problem is so diverse. Because we can feel half a million different negative things at half a million different times, it just...I don't know. How do you expect people to deal with that?

A problem shared isn't a problem halved. It just problemises other people. FYI, no, I don't think there's such a word. Problemises. Seriously, Vicki. =.=" Point is, some people care enough to try. But if your emotions get in the way, well...I don't know what happens, but I'm pretty sure its not good.

And what is the definition of "emotions getting in the way"?

I'm not too sure either. Like I said. Its bloody diverse. And I'm still trying to figure out exactly what's pounding on the cell walls of my brain.

Oh, sorry, bio relapse. My brain cells don't have cell walls. Sorry, sorry.

I used to think counselling was bull. I'm still kinda skeptical about it actually. But...maybe, it wasn't as dope as I used to think it was. I'm...changing my mind. Like I said, its a gradual thing that has been happening over the past few days.

Okay, truth is, I went for this counselling test a couple of days ago. While the results were bloody darn accurate, it didn't do anything much other than confuse me more.

DESPITE THAT.

I'm starting to think counselling IS an option. Unlike last time where I scoff at the mere thought of it.

Maybe...just maybe, it really can help. (Before anyone yells at me on MSN that counselling HAS helped countless people before, please let me remind you that I'm totally referring to myself. As in, I used to think counselling was not an option for me, but now I think it could be.)

That aside.

I...suddenly ran out of words. Like, slam dush bang. Poof. Everything I wanted to express...just kinda disappeared. Maybe its God reminding me that I really need to sleep now, so He sent all my thoughts to Recycle Bin.

Its okay, I'll retrieve them later, when I'm slightly more awake.

The problem with these kind of posts is... I kinda can't stop talking.

Like, my fingers just fly across the keyboard and I type the entire thing within 3 minutes.

And I can't stop talking, even after I've said everything I wanted to...or could have said.

Think I'll just shut up and go to sleep.

Oh before that, I have something to say. To a very special dearest someone. Which is kinda personal, but to be honest, I don't mind the whole world seeing it. Haha, on second thought, don't bother reading this. Just skip to the signing off.

To be blatantly honest, I really get annoyed with you all the time. I disagree with you all the time. I roll my eyes at you all the time. I don't really like the way you do things all the time. I just wanna hit you real hard in the face all the time...well, sometimes. I could list out 30 adjectives on you that aren't flattering at all (but I won't...'cuz then you might really get mad at me. O.o). But I just can't not care about you. I'm definitely not one of your bigger fans, but I just...I just...I'm just not me without you, okay? It just doesn't feel right. Feels like an unattended wasp sting. Or rather, like a bee buzzing around my head. At least a wasp sting can just hurt like shit, then I'll be done with it. But nooo, you have to be a bloody insect that just buzzes and buzzes around my mind and won't go away.

So.

So I'm really glad we made up, okay? Or at least, I think we made up. We did, right? No more silent treatment? =S I'm gonna throw my cornflakes at you today and you're not going to complain. =D

Oh, here's the funny part. Nobody even noticed we weren't talking. Ha-ha. Nobody except for Mean Girl and the people we confided in. Ha-ha. Are we really that unnoticeable? Bleh.

One last thing, before I end my essay. You really have everything. =) And as a person, that should really piss me off, but as a friend, I'm really happy for you. So just remember to be grateful for all the things you have right now, because from what I'm seeing, a lot of other people wants those things too (including me), but they can't have it like you do. =) Show a little more appreciation, and complain a little less! XD

Okay, I'mma go die now.

~Smartee Pants IS BACK.

P.S. Like I said. Once I start, I can't stop. Shut up Vicki, just shut up and go to bed.

P.P.S. Hey you, no, not you, the other you, yeah you, you know who I'm talking about, no, wait, you obviously don't, but still, just make a guess and yeah... you.

I just wanted to tell you that... it won't work.

Because of one...actually, two very-obvious-if-you-think-about-it reasons.

And I rather face that realisation now than have it distract me later on when I can't  afford to be distracted.

So, yeah, sorry. Too bad, huh?

Do me a favour, will you? If you, as in, YOU, know what I'm talking about you, just let me know. Or ask me why. Or, whatever, just tell me that you know. So if I don't get a message about this, then I'd automatically assume you didn't read this, or you read this and you're so blur you don't even know I'm talking about you, or your pride got in the way and you didn't say anything because you weren't sure if I was talking about you, OR... you just couldn't care less. So unless for some reason you want me thinking along those lines, then send a message.

Whatever it is, I can't be your safety net anymore. That night... no matter how happy I felt, was a mistake.

So, as of today, IT STOPS.


Sooner or later, you can forget about me~

And that, my friend, was Michelle Branch's original lyrics for that song before she changed it to what it is now.

Read between the lines.


P.P.S. I feel so relieved. =)

Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood.

Here's the deal.

I need to go hunting for black-dark-glitter-emo-ish kind of clothes + shoes that make me look at least 3 inches taller than I really am.

Unfortunately, my shopping partner-in-crime will be unavailable throughout March holidays. (Aww, Terribly Nice, whyyyyy?)

And my mum is such a critic when it comes to me spending $$.

And its not like I'm totally hyped up on mall-hopping alone.

So, what to do? What do I do?

Hmm.

I shall do what I do best.

Sleep.

Good night, peeps.

~Smartee


P.S. You finally got what you wanted, right?

I hope you're happy now.


P.P.S. I can't stop listening to Katy Perry's E.T. That's gotta be one of the best songs ever produced in mainstream music's history. Ever.

Trinity.

Three things.

One.
After a 4 month hiatus, I'm finally went back to one of the places I thought I didn't miss, but actually did. A lot.

I missed the people.
I missed the laughter.
I missed you...especially you.
But most importantly, I missed remembering what it was like after I forgot.

I thought I remembered, but in truth, I'd forgotten what it was like to just serve You because I want to.

Now that I remember again, I will never forget. Ever. Pinky promise. =) Help me keep that promise, okay?

That aside.

Two.
It was mummy's birthday today and we went for Japanese buffet...again. I swear, for the past few weeks, I've been overloading on food. My poor abused gut. =(

Oh, and here's the first thing my bro said to me when he saw me at dinner.

Bro: Why are you sporting that dark, black look?
Me: Excuse me?
Bro: You look like those dark, mysterious chicks. All in black. =.="
Me: The way I look is parallel to the way I feel.
Bro: So what are you depressed about now? Studies or guys?
Me: Hello??? =.="

I have the best siblings in the world. =.="
For your info, I was wearing black and white. And eyeliner, just for kicks. But how does that turn me into dark and mysterious? I wear black all the time. O.o Hmm.

Three.
So many things are happening in life right now. So, so, so many things. Its as close to perfection as it'll ever get, I suppose. Everything is falling into place, not perfectly, but just the way it should be.

And yet why do I still feel this way?

I guess I already know, but I just don't want to admit it to myself.

Because facing the truth doesn't always lead you to enlightenment. It just buries you deeper in that hole of dirt and pain.

So you don't leave me a choice. Too bad for me then.

~Smartee

P.S. Terribly Nice, I was reading through our old messages awhile ago. And I can't help but feel so happy when you're so protective of me. When you defend me without even knowing the whole story. When you called the other person a bitch just because she made me unhappy. Just because I'm your friend. Thank you. =) 

P.P.S. Don't you worry your pretty little mind 'cause people throw rocks at things that shine.

And life makes love look hard.


P.P.P.S. Inhale. I'm not okay, but I will be. Exhale.

Paperback

Times bookshop had a book sale in Fahrenheit today. =)

And I saw so many books that I very, very desperately wanted to read. =(  John Grisham, Darren Shan, Stephanie Meyer, Sidney Sheldon... especially Sidney Sheldon. Never forget Sidney Sheldon.

Unfortunately, my last name is neither Waldorf or Van der Woodsen, so I was reduced to a self-inflicted less-than-hundred budget.

Had to pick up a couple of Jeffrey Archer's books though. Just couldn't resist their covers. Always judge a book by its cover. =)

---------------------------------------------

Exams aren't over, but I'm declaring holiday already. Too bad, chemistry. How does abandonment feel?
Woke up at 2...pm today. =O Sleep is really the best thing in the world. T.T

Tomorrow's mummy's birthday. I still haven't thought of what to buy. Such a terrible daughter. =(

~Smarteepants

P.S. I haven't been in a cinema for nearly...1..2..3..4..5...5 months! =O  No social life. T.T  No social life at all.

P.P.S. Dying to watch Tron.

P.P.P.S. And Sucker Punch.

P.P.P.P.S. Mummy's making me cash up now for the eighty bucks I spent today. =.="

Brain like mine.

Name: Vicki Lee
Birth date: 3rd July 1994
Death date: 23rd February 2011


Hello, add math.

Goodbye, world.

Scent of fear.

Okay I'm not suppose to be here, but just a quick thought.

Do scented candles keep you awake or help you sleep?

'Cause on one hand, I'm feeling extremely sleepy, but on the other hand, my eyes won't stay closed.

Wild goose chase

Exams are taking the life out of me, and we're not even into the real exam week. T_T

It feels like the calm before the storm. Saturdays and Sundays are so deceiving, sigh.

Ohh, yesterday was so fun. T_T After draining all my non-existent skills to convince two teachers - two, not one, but two T_T - to let me skip music club, I had to run all the way to the 4th floor to look for my IU day duet partner who is extremely good at disappearing at the wrong times. And apparently Ivan was looking for him also. So he went solo hunting while I stupidly walked right into my music club teacher who then started rambling non-stop on the club activities and asked me to pass a message to Pearly.

So I had to go all the way back to the music club meeting place and deliver Her Majesty's instructions where thank God I found Ben but then he was suppose to meet Ivan so he went upstairs searching and I went downstairs where I met...Ivan and then we went looking for Ben upstairs again but couldn't find him so we went downstairs and...

Well, basically, the 3 of us were running around like idiots looking for each other. I wonder if God was looking down and laughing while watching us miss each other by seconds.

Anyway, that aside.

I realised that... I write alot of crap on my blog. Like, literal crap that doesn't even make sense some times.

Its a blog, I should write more about my life, right? =.="

So, lately, its like... sudden enlightenment. On.. alot of things.

And I finally figured out something I've been feeling for the past few years. That feeling of... unsatisfaction, as if there's always something that is missing. As though that perfect life is within my reach, but its time just hasn't come.

Maybe its 'cause I've just been waiting for all my problems to... I don't know, go away...evaporate... disappear.

But I guess they're never really going to.

Some days are great, but no matter how things turn out, there's always...always gonna be something unpleasant, whether its too small to be significant or world-ending painfully huge.

So maybe I should just stop waiting and start doing stuff I wanna do. Then maybe I won't feel so unsatisfied, as though something's hanging in the air by a thread.


Seeeee... I'm not making sense again.

I'm just gonna leave before I say something here that I'll really regret later when I'm sober.

~V

P.S. I spent the whole of yesterday doing  nonsensical stuff when I was suppose to be studying for math.

So you can imagine how relieved I was when I could actually answer the paper. Phew.

Delusional.

Let's just cut straight to the point.

I was sick on the day before exam. How awesome is that?

And on the day of the much-hated exam, which also happened to be V-day (although it felt more like D-day), I was twice as sick.

I swear, during the Physics paper, the words just started floating right off the page.

And I had to take of my glasses and stare for a couple of minutes before they stayed put.

AND it just kept happening.

Until I finally freaked out and just decided to give up and screw the entire paper.

BM was a little bit better, but considering circumstances, not by much.

Moving on to happier things, I really shocked Angelo today with a surprise visit with a surprise. Really, really zapped  him.

His face was epic.

~V

P.S. I'm really delusional sometimes. =)

Wake up.

So exams are next week. Yay. Joy. Clap clap.

And what was I doing today?

Let's see, first I pretended to study in the morning.

Then I went shopping with mummy in the afternoon.
Then I went for a dinner party in the evening.
Then I went...and am...online at night.

Screw exams.

Japanese buffet + BBQ is awesome. The kids table... I mean, youth... table... ordered approximately 20 plates of beef. And that was a fraction of what we ate. I'm stuffed. No way I'm getting on the scales anytime within the next few days. Too much excess baggage.

Who wanna teman me go running tomorrow? XD 

Haha, we really gave Angelo hell at dinner. 'Cause I kinda...sort of...purposely stole his girlfriend's number after he threatened to ruin my Facebook life.

Angelo: *on phone with gf* Hey babe, if you receive any calls from numbers starting with 016, 012 or 010, please don't answer! Its my stupid friends being idiots!

Nicole: *laughing to self* I'm 014...

Ashley: Haha, I'm 017.

Vicki: And I'm 019. LOL, we're so not on her hit list. XD

His gf is listed as "My Babe" in his phone contacts. Seriously? =.="  We "babed" him nonstop throughout dinner. =D

We're really so mean. XD

Here's pics from the dinner party.

Yep, little Chloe put that green flower in Angelo's hair.

On both sides, haha.

Playing games. (Nicole won that one. XD)

Gaming freaks. (Ashley won that one XD)

This guy totally rocks my world.

The adults table. =)

The kids, err, teens...and uhh, young adult table. =)

Chloe and her green flowers.

Audrey & Nicole. Its hard to decide who's cuter. =)

Uncle Gary & his lovely wife.

Daddy & mummmy.

Katrina & me. =)

Katrina, me, Angelo & Christopher. Lovely neighbours. =) Except for Angelo. Grr.

Me & Katrina. =)

Me & Christopher. =)

Don't ask. I really have no idea why its sideways. Blogger is really stupid.

Ahhh, I found the perfect prom dress. Now if only I'm skinny enough. T_T

Lets go running tomorrow. Burning calories is GOOD.

I'm gonna smile - or pretend to smile - 'cause I deserve to. =)



I just realised I haven't uploaded Bangkok pictures here. And I probably won't...so, here's a few.

I just realised...

...that I really love photography.

Even though I'm not so good at it.

Me & my leng chai cousin. =P

Look at mummy's goofy face. =O

Family photo on some...weird...cruise...that served awesome Thai food.

Daddy, my leng chai cousin's leng lui girlfriend, mummy & my leng chai cousin. =)

Love this photo.

Father & daughter.

Ultra large durians. =O They kinda ultra stink too.

Family photo with the household's pet elephant. XD

The pet part was a joke. =.="

Camwhoring while waiting for the plane to take off.

I have the dorkiest mum in the world. =)

Epic failure. Nevermind, inner joke.





I'm off to bed.

~V

P.S. I'm chatting with my mum on Facebook. Like, how abnormal is that? =O

P.P.S. I finished your song. Our song. Its as close as anything to perfection. =)

P.P.P.S. Its not worth faking it if its not real. That's why I don't =) unless I want...or have...to.

P.P.P.P.S. ANGELO, YOU WATCH OUT. Upload any weird pictures of me on Facebook and I'll call your "My Babe"! =O