Wild goose chase

Exams are taking the life out of me, and we're not even into the real exam week. T_T

It feels like the calm before the storm. Saturdays and Sundays are so deceiving, sigh.

Ohh, yesterday was so fun. T_T After draining all my non-existent skills to convince two teachers - two, not one, but two T_T - to let me skip music club, I had to run all the way to the 4th floor to look for my IU day duet partner who is extremely good at disappearing at the wrong times. And apparently Ivan was looking for him also. So he went solo hunting while I stupidly walked right into my music club teacher who then started rambling non-stop on the club activities and asked me to pass a message to Pearly.

So I had to go all the way back to the music club meeting place and deliver Her Majesty's instructions where thank God I found Ben but then he was suppose to meet Ivan so he went upstairs searching and I went downstairs where I met...Ivan and then we went looking for Ben upstairs again but couldn't find him so we went downstairs and...

Well, basically, the 3 of us were running around like idiots looking for each other. I wonder if God was looking down and laughing while watching us miss each other by seconds.

Anyway, that aside.

I realised that... I write alot of crap on my blog. Like, literal crap that doesn't even make sense some times.

Its a blog, I should write more about my life, right? =.="

So, lately, its like... sudden enlightenment. On.. alot of things.

And I finally figured out something I've been feeling for the past few years. That feeling of... unsatisfaction, as if there's always something that is missing. As though that perfect life is within my reach, but its time just hasn't come.

Maybe its 'cause I've just been waiting for all my problems to... I don't know, go away...evaporate... disappear.

But I guess they're never really going to.

Some days are great, but no matter how things turn out, there's always...always gonna be something unpleasant, whether its too small to be significant or world-ending painfully huge.

So maybe I should just stop waiting and start doing stuff I wanna do. Then maybe I won't feel so unsatisfied, as though something's hanging in the air by a thread.


Seeeee... I'm not making sense again.

I'm just gonna leave before I say something here that I'll really regret later when I'm sober.

~V

P.S. I spent the whole of yesterday doing  nonsensical stuff when I was suppose to be studying for math.

So you can imagine how relieved I was when I could actually answer the paper. Phew.